I Learned To Love

"You're not going to remind him why he loves you by staying away.

Nothing worth it is ever easy."

Two simple phrases, make you wonder don't they? "Have I tried as hard as I could?" And yet, it doesn't work that way.. You can't make someone love you, you can't force yourself on someone. It only produces resentment. So why exactly does it come down to the two simple phrases time after time?

It's either they love you or they don't, so why do we hope? Once it's done you should believe them right? Wrong. The hope, no matter how minute in size, is still there. Always, just waiting for its opportunity to poke up its head. And with it, it brings the discontent. The doubts, the "what if"s. My God do I hate the "what if"s. You always know what to do when you look back, "Man I should have said THAT" or "If only I wouldn't have...", you know them. The thoughts in the back of your mind, that seem to penetrate your very soul. Ah, if we only had the power to turn back time. Life would be simpler, or would it?

If you could change things, would you? Or do you think that we are better off with the choices we have made, and the consequences for them. I believe everything is a learning experience, but what I have learned from this one I'm not quite sure of yet. I'm sure it will expose itself in time.

So, am I going to try? Am I going to give it my one last shot? No, I'm not, because someone once told me that everyone has a purpose in your life, you learn from everyone. No matter how small of a part they play in the grand scheme of things, you won't always notice it, but you will learn.

With you I learned how to love.

later days...